Posts Tagged ‘darkness’

the thought crosses my mind and of course, that doesn’t make it right

but still

it crosses my mind and tickles the back of my brain like a bad tag in the collar of a t shirt
and it concerns the garden of eden




Posted: January 3, 2016 in darkness

she caught my eye from across the room

blond and thin, boyish but feminine
small breasts, like i like them
her dress had one of those angled hems that revealed one thigh but not the other
her legs were thin, at least the one i could see was
she looked at me with interest, but also with a modesty that suggested virginity
i was intoxicated by her presence (more…)
i'm seldom lonely
i don't know why
maybe i've just gotten used to it
maybe it's because loneliness,
when it does come,
is usually accompanied by more pressing
but loneliness is seldom my primary foe


during the divorce people made some pretty harsh judgments about me

some were false

some were true

but no one judged me more harshly than i did
the upshot is this
when everyone condemns you
and deep inside, your response is
– ‘you don’t even know’
well, it’s ultimately very freeing


it is finished

Posted: June 7, 2015 in darkness, god stuff
Tags: ,

remember that old saying

please be patient

god isn’t finished with me yet?


but what if he is

what if he’s absolutely, completely, washed his hands like pontius pilate, finished with me

i just get tired
of all the things
the pressures
the responsibilities
the grind

i just want
to walk away
to disappear
to melt into the landscape


a wish list

Posted: May 19, 2015 in darkness, infp
Tags: ,

i wish that i could know the depths of desperation

i wish that i could know the liberation of absolute failure

i wish that i could know the relief of all my secrets being exposed

i wish that i could know the vacuum of isolation